Monday, November 4, 2013
Brylin wanted to compete with Brenner and apparently wanted to win for the most dramatic entry into the world, and well she won by a ton!
It all started Oct 24, 2013 when my body was having some contractions, they were every 2-3 mins apart, but nothing serious or sore so I just kept ignoring them-- most people would think that was crazy except for the fact that from about 30 weeks on I had contractions all the time with her. Anyway they kept coming and I kept ignoring and then around 5:30 I had this super strong feeling I needed to get to the hospital. So we packed up the kids, took them to my parents house and off we went.
When we got there they hooked me up to the heart monitor and her little heart beat was all over the place, super high down to super low and it was so stressful. They broke my water so they could stick the heart monitor on her head in hopes that they would be able to get a more accurate reading, which never happened.. One strange event after another just happened. Normally after my water breaks my babies literally fall out. With the girls when my water broke they were out within the hour, Brenner his water broke as his head was coming out, but with her they broke my water and my body didn't want to dilate. It was going slow, and her heart beat was getting slower and not coming back up. After 4 mins straight of it going down and not up they were panicking and instantly rushing me off to the operating room to do a c-section. It was so rushed, I remember mass nurses and doctors and Jordan asking me if I was ok, and me saying no. It was so scary. My babies heart beat was dropping and the thought of being cut open was so scary.
Before they had decided c-section they tried 3 times to put an epidural in my back, which didn't work. So because of that they had to put me completely under. (another odd event, which made them not able to do a spinal but I had to be put right out) I remember this super tight mask on my face which was making me start to panic because I couldn't breathe and then a horrible burning in my throat and then I was out.
I woke up seeing Jordan, my mom, Marie my sister and Adam - I had no clue what had happened, I was so out of it I had no clue what was going on. I heard parts of the story but nothing phased me until the next day when I was explained again what had happened. I remember Adam and Jordan giving me a blessing but I don't remember one word that was said in it.
After coming with it, I was told that I had really been out for 3 or 4 hours, and during the c-section my uterus tore down pretty bad in the opposite direction and I was bleeding pretty bad and they had a hard time stopping the bleeding to be able to stitch me up. They had to give me (i think it was) 3 bags of blood in the operating room. But luckily they stopped the bleeding and were able to stitch me up and left this horrible drain tube hanging out of my stomach (sickest feeling was having that tube ripped out.. it makes me cringe thinking of it now). I was told after it just so happened that the best doctors and residents and nurses were all on that night- so thankful for that!!
So it turns out my princess had a super tight knot in her cord making her heart drop as bad as it was. They tested the blood in her cord after she came out and said there was next to no oxygen left in her blood and if she hadn't came when she did there was a very high chance shed of been a still born baby. She was born October 24, 2013 at 8:43pm and was 6 lbs 1 ounce and 19 1/4 inches long.
Someone (well we all know who) was definitely watching over me and my baby that day. The events that were odd just all added up to make sure she came how she did so she was able to live. My body always dilates fast, If it had and I had tried pushing her out who knows what would have happened to her. I don't even like to think of the thought that this perfect angel could not be here today.
Recovering hasn't been so super awesome. Man c-sections suck! thats all I can say. Getting up and attempting to walk after being out and in bed for a couple days was horrible, so dizzy and man so hard to walk. I still am so sore, my lower back feels like it will never recover, my tail bone is literally numb and aches from the hospital bed and my mass mass mass MASS headaches make it impossible to function. Funny how the things that hurt the most are not even my stomach... BUT of course that isn't awesome to have that there.
While in the recovering area of the hospital I did have to get another 3 bags of blood put into me as my red blood cell count was way to low. They gave me one bag and after doing the blood tests my levels were still super low. My brother in law Brock came in to the hospital after that news so him and Jordan could give me another blessing. I sat holding my baby crying as they laid their hands on my head and gave me a blessing. It was so comforting to hear that everything was going to be ok, because at that point it didn't feel that way at all. It felt like everything was falling apart, and nothing was going in the right direction. But the words of my blessing were instant comfort and the knowledge that my body would heal was exactly the words I needed to hear. They gave me 2 more bags of blood packed full of red blood cells which my body really needed since my red blood cell count was so incredibly low.
Finally when they got a reading of 88 (apparently my normal is around 130) they let me go home. I am SO thankful for the people who took time to donate blood!! I cant just say a general thank you enough for those who take time to donate blood. Without it I probably wouldn't be here.
BUT after all that complaining it was all worth it, its all worth every pain, trial and experience to have my baby here. My baby who is currently laying on my chest sleeping so peacefully who I love so very much.
Every day is going to be better than the next. Its a horrible struggle not being able to do much at all, no lifting no being able to help out like normal. Worst of all for me is not being able to carry and hold and lift Brenner. I'm having just as hard of a time with that as he is. I want him to not feel abandoned because of the baby, I want so badly to be able to lift him into his bed and put him to sleep or hold him when he's sad. It makes me so sad even typing this that i've had to stop doing that.
Jordan has became mommy and daddy and been doing everything since we got home. He's been so amazing and I am so thankful for the support and hard work he does every day. I couldn't have pulled through without him, I love him so much.
We are so blessed to have the final addition now in our family. What a perfect way to end off the amount of kids we are having, Brylin is perfect and man she's cute!!!! She has such a sweet spirit and her little body must be working really hard at finishing growing since she seriously sleeps all day long. The kids all love her so much, she is just definitely loved mass amounts by everyone.
My family has been shown so much love, service and compassion this last week its been unreal. We have had a meal every night since coming home from the hospital and mass amounts of help from family. Brenner thinks he should move in with my mom and asks every day to go to my parents house so he can be with my mom all day long. I think he's decided he should live with her not me right now.
But we are so so thankful for all of the help and love we have been given during this trying time. Its been hard and a great trial to remember what is important in life, and to remember we are never alone and we are always being cared for and watched out for.